"every plan is a tiny prayer to father time"

dear chelsea.

as of friday, you are 24 years old. over the past 288 months you have learned a thing or two about the world around you, and yourself. you are intimidated by salons. all those bright lights, trendy dressed stylists, mirrors mirrors everywhere, black and white clothes and snippy 'tudes make you feel inadequate. resulting in stress and anxiety and sometimes, sweaty palms. however, you feel the need to have professionally trimmed hair, so you continue to go despite the experience. the world isn't always a safe place, but more than likely a smile will ease both your wariness and others. of course, sometimes it will just make the person in the next car feel awkward.  you have no sense of direction. none. you take visual clues to know where you are going, so heaven forbid they change the paint on a building, because most likely you will end up lost, calling jeff, and frustrated. you should buy a GPS navigator, but somehow that $199 always ends up somewhere else. people think differently from each other. they react differently to different situations. the feel differently about things, and have different opinions. that one you have to relearn sometimes. you don't know how to act around people who are sad. you always want to be left alone when you are sad, so you tend to leave others alone. that's not always the best reaction (see previous point.) you like your eyebrows. minimal maintenance gives you a clean, full brow. you are very glad you didn't follow the thin eyebrow trend a few years back. you are not competitive. almost to your detriment. you could not care less about winning, ere go you don't like any sports or competitions or board games. this makes you fairly dull, but easy going. sometimes people are easily offended, and they show it on their faces. you wish you could learn to play the cello. you don't dress very well, but you like to tell yourself you have some sort of style. (don't worry, we won't spoil the illusion) petra is the biggest source of laughter you have, and your fullest moments of reflection are often the same ones you are staring at her. you like burgermaster, even though you know better. rain makes some people depressed. it makes you feel alive. rain also makes people stay home from play group so you and petra end up at the park alone. in the rain. eating graham crackers. (you think in seattle people would be more willing to endure the rain)  you dread the day petra realizes you are that mom. you know, the one that doesn't get it. jeff doesn't deserve you, but then again, you don't deserve jeff. but that's what makes fighting and laughing so much fun. you are only 24, but you miss being young and cool (you were never that cool) and going to shows (going to shows didn't make you any cooler) and knowing music (that's no excuse for lack of cool). you did have some good times, and have more good times to come. you have broke some hearts and had yours broken. some people didn't like you, some people still don't like you. some do like you, and some people love you. that's not a bad tally. twenty-four may leave you lacking in some life experience, but that is what is so exciting. 

besides, the fall line up is starting, and the new GOSSIP GIRL tonight will make you feel like a kid again. 

xoxolovexoxo

yourself. 

ps. call the chiropractor on tuesday.