( rills. check that face. delicious.)
I don't like change. and neither does my body apparently. here is the dealio, yo.
I weigh more now than I ever have in my life.
I can't believe that I just put that on the internet.
I kinda feel sick.
but it's all I can think about.
which sucks, because what kind of selfish person thinks about themselves all the time? this kind. apparently.
rillbot is 15 months old. I have been working out fairly consistently since she was born. I have tried to watch what I eat, for the most part. and I have only gained weight.
I have lost a few pounds, here and there, with very strict diets that made me cry myself to sleep because I felt to awful. awful like shaky, weak, nauseous and crazy. they never stuck, obviously. but for the most part, the scale has slowly been climbing. since I got pregnant with pita.
I don't get it. I know my diet is not perfect. my exercise routine is not perfect. but I feel like the things I do, and the things other people do, have insanely different results.
the last few weeks I have made a renewed effort. exercise for an hour five days a week. don't eat after seven. there was my birthday weekend, we had guests. I made a few exceptions. got back on track.
I finally braved the scale this morning.
I gained two pounds.
I am so tired of thinking about this, but I am afraid if I stop, I will balloon even higher, and my health will deteriorate as I get older. i gotta get this under control.
how in the freakin' world do you all lose weight? be honest. is it ridiculously hard, and I am totally kidding myself? or is my metabolism just some kind of genetic joke? help me out peops. share your tales. I need a reality check.
(how obnoxious are pity-party posts? all it's missing are a few more capital letter vowels strung together followed by a thousand exclamation marks... how embarrassing)
(**post edit** it's been five minutes and I am already embarrassed that I published this. yikes. but since it's out there... gimme your two cents anyway? kthanks.)
9 comments:
how come squishy chubby babies are so fantastic, but the same doesn't go for adults?
anyways... if i want to lose weight, i get pregnant. i'm sick for 9 months and throw up for half of them. works like a charm. down 25 pounds with my first, about 10 with em's and the verdict is still out with baby #3.
no, but seriously... my body and i aren't friends, she just doesn't get me.
i can workout like crazy and that helps as long as i'm consistent for a long period of time, but the biggest change happens for me when i'm controlling my portions. and i rarely lose actual weight, the sure tell sign that i'm "losing" anything is how my pants fit, not what the scale says.
good luck chelsea, i like using the excuse of being pregnant for not working out, but that excuse will only be good for a couple more months, when i'll be in that same boat again.
you know what got rid of my baby weight? getting divorced. although that perk is pretty awesome (thank you cosmos!), i don't recommend it.
since then i've had to be really concerted about not gaining it all back [metabolism slowing down with age is so mean.] so i've done a lot of reading, tried some fads, got ocd about working out, and learned some/things along the way.
someone told me a while ago that it is 80% diet and 20% working out. i 100% believe that. when i work out like crazy 5 days a week, it's WAY easy for me to justify unhealthy snacking. well, i worked out, so i earned it right? [fail.]
so for my diet, and i know that this is a touchy touchy issue, i've gone about 85% vegetarian. after reading "eat to live" and "in defense of food" and various other fact-driven, non-sensationalism books, that made the most sense to me. and after reading what exactly carbs do to our bodies, how the processed and over-processed complexes convert almost immediately to glucose, a more green and natural diet made the most sense to ME, although i'm not fully hardcore about it. the "eat to live" diet is insane. but i modify it to where i feel comfortable.
all in all, i feel better about my choices. i feel better being able to pronounce the ingredients in my food. i feel better energy-wise.
i'm not perfect, by any means, i love me some taco bell and could down a bag of cheetos in one sitting. but i've learned that if i am excessive in either of those, i feel like shiz.
food is a huge part of our lives, of our culture, of our family together times, and our date nights [...if you're so lucky. help me!!.] i feel like it's another one of those things that we have to figure out for ourselves, find what fits for us and our families, and what makes us feel best about ourselves. experiment around. make it a project and not this huge heavy burden.
p.s. you're beautiful. seriously.
chelsea, just know that you're not alone. i eat way healthier and exercise more than a lot of my friends and sisters, and nothing really changes that much.
BUT i went to a naturopathic physician recently, mostly because i was having lots of symptoms of a hormone imbalance (bad skin, fatigue, weight gain, etc. etc.). i also always had a lot of joint pain. anyway, after she took a look at my "healthy" diet she pointed out that i was eating too much wheat. who would have guessed?! i thought wheat was healthy. anyway, since i stopped eating it a few weeks ago i have lost like 8 pounds (!!!) and honestly its not that hard. wheat is in soo many things but there are still so many things you can eat.
i think every person is different, so not sure that will be something that helps you, but maybe it's worth a shot.
also, i completely agree with all of sarah's comment above. especially the part that it's 80% diet and 20% exercise.
I heard something along the lines of 60% diet, 40% exercising. I'm gonna stick with that cuz I certainly don't have the motivation to change my diet that much.
The only time I've been able to lose weight is when I've trained for a race. Not saying you have train for/participate in a certain event -- just that having a precise exercise goal certainly helps. And training has given me more motivation to change my diet too, even if it wasn't a big change. (A bunch of us are doing the Sedona Half Marathon/10k/5k in February. You guys will be due for a visit by then. Just sayin'.)
(i wrote that comment, closed the laptop and went straight to school. half-way through the drive i felt utter embarrassment over its length. sorry.)
this is some really good advice guys. really. thank you so much!
Oh, you are so beautiful. 2 things: Dzana just posted on her blog and maybe it would be helpful. And it would be fun if you came walking with me and Sarah at night, or joined me at the y or doing yoga. If you want . . .
i was deciding if should comment or not becuase, lets face it, i dont always practice what i preach. but, my sister is pretty much bomb diggity at being healthy (she's a boring lunch partner) and she heard about "eating for your blood type" from her mil (who is also bomb diggity) well i read it and it was so interesting. the things i shouldn't eat with my blood type are the things that usually leave me feeling gross. (oil/red meat/wheat)but i can have sugar! thank goodness. and i never noticed that food coma feeling from sugar. i dont really think this is a fad diet because its just sugguesting what to elminate, and i think everyone is going to lose and gain weight differently.
i'm training for this marathon, as you know. and when i first started running an hour plus, i lost weight, now i've gained weight back. the next person that tells me "muscle weighs more then fat" i'm going to punch them in the face. (okay, okay, i know its true. but i was convinced i'd lost 20 or more while training) so i agree with sarah. 80% diet. which sucks.
wow sorry, this is so long, and like i said, i'm no expert.
good luck, chelsea!
i second sarah's "eat to live" shout out. although this comment is long overdue and you apparently have things under wraps, i've recently grown out of all of the jeans in my closet even though i was still running, then got my diet back under control just barely 10 days ago with a rounded out "eat to live" (which is what i did after jonah) philosophy and i'm already 10 lbs down (bloating weight mostly) and back in my clothes.
i try to keep to an 80% fruits & veggies/15% fats & meats/5% wheats&breads. roughly speaking. and no flavored beverages - water is my best friend. i just try to fill up on the 80% part first during meals. i like to call my diet the word of wisdom. they may have gotten something right when they wrote that...
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