one hundredth post

apparently this is my one hundredth post... that's a lot of pressure. it should be something commemorative, deep, moving, monumental or at least interesting right? so much pressure. 

I am afraid all I have are a few fleeting thoughts that have been passing through my mind the last few weeks. 

I love leaves. I love fall. Fall is upon us here is good ol' WA state. Once while driving a winding road I found myself in a flurry of falling leaves from a gust of wind. I safely stopped my car in the middle of the road and just watched. What a beautiful world we live in. So many magic moments to be had. 

In spite of this magic world full of wonderful nature, I find myself in a feud with bugs. Spiders to be more precise. I am fine with the pretty white moths that hang out by our door, as seen above.  As it gets colder out, the spiders find refuge in our warm apartment. They seem to have confused us with a safe-haven shelter for arachnids. They show up everywhere! And not little spiders either. Remember this post? Imagine finding a similar friend resting under your purse, sitting in front of your door, hanging out on the wall above your head... ugh. It's standing room only in here. I know I should love all of God's creatures, but they need to stay out of my house. Please. You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here. I think we are keeping Raid in business. 

I am in the nursery in my ward at church, and I like it. It's definitely challenging, but worth it. It's hard work to get the children to trust you and like you. To keep them entertained and happy. To help them learn important lessons about having a Heavenly Father who loves them, about making good choices. (although this new manual will really help. great for families too) Sometimes the day leaves you feeling exhausted. Sometimes you have to be the bad guy in order to follow guidelines and keep everyone safe. Other days a few kids pay attention and learn something. Other days they remember your name when they say good bye. Other days they successfully share and play kindly.  Usually it's a mix of both. I feel it is a job worth doing well, because these children are important. 

There is never enough money. I think that will never change. Oh well. 

I am terrible at making new friends. I always put my foot in my mouth or act shy or go gun-shy on calling someone to do something. My nerves always get the best of me and I am either silent or saying something I don't mean. Luckily people keep giving me a chance. Awesome and appreciated. Especially because I am such a nerd. 

I have no idea on what Petra should be for Halloween. I have the notion that she should be a plain old witch. Black raggedy dress, black hat, maybe (just maybe)  a wand. That's it. No make-up, no wigs... I don't know if they even make those kind of costumes any more. Any other ideas on what a fairly tall two year old could be for All Hallows Eve?  Oh and we will be in Arizona so the weather should be fairly nice. 

Petra will be two in a couple of weeks. I keep debating on whether or not she should have a party. I think money is just too tight. Therefore I am leaning towards a little family gathering of the three of us doing the thing she loves. Playing at the park, getting presents, eating cupcakes and spending time with mom and dad. Love is what makes a birthday right?  Right? 

Jeff is my best friend. He makes me laugh and things are just less funny if he is not there. He amazes me all the time. I am, over and over, realizing how grateful I am that I married this man. I think everyone thinks they are marrying one person, and then they get another. Some of us are blessed to get something better than we even realized. 

I know I must be a great mother, because as I shake myself out of blogger-coma I find myself sitting in a pile of things Petra has brought me in an attempt to get my attention. Pens, mixing spoons, toys, paper towel rolls, cups... I didn't even notice. She must really like me. 

Well there you have it. My one hundredth post. Pretty much sums me up.  It's incomplete, slightly incoherent, and the parts don't seem to make a whole that makes any kind of sense. Yeup, that's pretty much me... Good thing people still like me anyway. 

ps. updated the family blog with a ton of  pictures of petra. yes, it's a bit over board, but that's why it's a separate blog. sheesh.